V.J. asked us to write on destination. At the moment I don’t feel I am going anywhere or moving in any direction. Living alone for the first time in my life, these past two years have been emotionally challenging. I question my reason for being here in this moment and the way life presents itself to me.
My solitude is a huge part of my life yet my mind is full of thoughts that wander. I set out to do something and end up doing something else. Then I remember what I had originally started out to do. (V.J. this is familiar)
My final destination is approaching, inescapable at my age. In the meantime I sense that I am at a standstill. This to me feels like a good thing. Yet I do have a little voice telling me I should do this or that, you know, be busy like everybody else.
The only thing is, I don’t want to be busy, I am happy being quiet and just being. Sounds so simple doesn’t it? Yet here I am, my own kind of destination until my destiny comes to get me to go somewhere else.
walking within my cloister
will I find meaning